2006-11-09

Sexual Incompatability

I'm gonna go a little off topic this time around. I typically don't write about sex. Although its a HUGE part of my life. I love sex.

I guess I try to tame it down a little bit now that I'm a mom. You know there are those people that you see who are exactly as they look. I'm not one of them. I'm a bundle of inconsistencies. Whether you are talking about my politics, religion, or sex.

For example...my good friend Matt said I should write about how I got the nickname "Bill". A camper had started calling me "hey you". I said "come on now, you know my name!" And Alex, ever the smart ass, shouted out "BillyBob!" True nuff, I was pretty much a redneck. Right down to my Justin lacers and from the words spilling out of my mouth, like "ya'll" you probably wouldn't think any different. Well, BillyBob got shortened to Billy which got shortened to Bill. And it stuck. For the last 9 years. A lot of campers and camp staff only know me as Bill. But Matt and Jason are the two who still regularly call me that. And Jason calls me William when he's pissed.

So....what's this have to do with sex? When I started dating Chuck, Matt desperately tried to talk me out of it. Because I was a mid-western, good girl who was as pure as a white lily. Little did he know that while I was still a virgin, I wasn't in my mind. But I'm very, very good at hiding things. So, when Chuck and I became VERY intimate our friends were a little shocked about how bold and well, freakish, I was considering where I came from.

A lot of talk within my mom's group lately has been about sex. About how they don't want it and their hubby does, or vica versa. Or just lately how the wifey wants it good and hard and rough and the hubby is freaked out by that.

According to many surveys, sex is the number 2 thing that couples fight about. Right after money. So don't you think that you'd want to be sure that you are sexually compatible BEFORE taking the plunge? In my book, sex is a huge thing in any relationship. I mean without that there isn't the intimacy, the connectedness, the kids ;)...so why not just live with your brother? (Okay, I'm not that redneck folks!!)

Now, I'm not saying that every couple needs to be freaky and rough. But, just be compatible to each other. Without that, there is such a likelyhood of infidelity and adultry. Beyond that though, if Chuck was a freak and I wasn't....I would be sooo insecure of what he really wanted and who he would go searching of to find it. Insecure that I wouldn't be able to satisfy him in every way within our relationship, because satisfaction of the body is as important as satisfaction of the brain.

I just thank God that Chuck and I are sexually compatible. And we love sex. Together.

12 comments:

Christi said...

Wow, Lisa, this post touches on about a 1000 points I have with DH and lack of sex! I used to think we were compatible. It all changed after two years but I completely agree with everything you have said in your post. I love sex too and surely ain't getting enough! It's pathetic. Really it is and I'm not a bore in bed either and I'm fine with keeping it spicy or changing it up ;) If things don't come right for us, I don't know where we will be. Because even though sex is #2 for most underneath money as #1, for us sex is #1 and I reckon it's worse than money issues. There's many personal feelings invovled with sex and the lack of it. We don't have the money issue at all, just sex. It's good that you and hubby aren't on the same sexual wave length ;)

Hannah said...

Hmmm Lisa, I actually thought you talked about sex quite a bit!! LMBO!!

Anyway, it's good that you guys are compatible. DH and I aren't exactly the same, but we compromise and make it work. It hasn't really been an issue and we don't fight about it. I think even if you aren't compatible, you have to be able to talk about it with each other, that's the most important thing.

Julie Julie Bo Boolie said...

My DH are compatible for the most part but still have some things that don't work out so well. We're a whole heck of a lot more compatible than I was with my first boyfriend though let me tell you that!

I'm satisfied with my sex life though I think it does fall outside the norm in that we don't connect that way terribly often for various reasons. It's always funny when we do manage to find the time and the energy though.. it's always like "Geee.. we REALLY should do that more often!"

Thanks for the reminder.

Julie

Rashenbo said...

Some nice and interesting posts! Thanks for sharing. I found you off:
http://www.cussandotherrants.com/

Cheers!

The other me said...

Julie...H and I say the same thing! " Now why don't we remember just how great that is??" Having teenagers who stay up til 1am and little kids that get up at 5am plays havoc with any energy we might have at our age!!

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